


When The Feathers Fall

by missangelamia



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Charlie Bradbury - Freeform, Crying, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Fluff and Smut, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Kissing, Love, M/M, Metatron - Freeform, Nudity, Oral Sex, Rimming, Sam Winchester - Freeform, Sharing beds, Stynes - Freeform, castiel - Freeform, hand holding, pain/sadness, sharing showers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-26
Updated: 2016-01-26
Packaged: 2018-05-13 12:13:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5707666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missangelamia/pseuds/missangelamia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are three stages in losing one's wings. But no one ever told Castiel. Burning sensations, migraines and bleeding and then everything just falls apart. Quite literally. But who else would be there for him other than Dean?</p>
            </blockquote>





	When The Feathers Fall

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Every Destiel Fan Ever](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Every+Destiel+Fan+Ever).



> This is new! And it's staying up! I'm angela. hi.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel loses his wings. Dean is right there with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter isn't that long. oops. hi. i'm angela. :)

  There are three stages in losing one’s wings. But you’re never taught what those stages are because it wasn’t part of the angel school curriculum because there wasn’t any angel school. There are multiple ways to lose your wings. But none are as painful as the detachment of your wings. The first stage is a burning sensation on one’s back. Castiel started to experience this on a Thursday afternoon. He was talking to Sam about Metatron when he nearly collapsed from the pain. It felt like searing hot water was pouring, repeatedly, over his skin. Like his skin was bubbling off. And later that night, he was in Dean’s bedroom, looking in the mirror. And he saw red burn scars littered on his back. He nearly cried from the pain as Dean applied cream and bandages telling him to relax and try and sleep, only for Castiel to argue back saying he doesn’t sleep while yawning.

  The second stage is migraines and bleeding from the root of one’s wing. This happened to Castiel not even a week later. Most likely that Monday. He’d never felt such pain his life. He threw up that night. And Dean was right by his side. And he fell asleep that night in Dean’s bed. But the next morning there were blood stains on the bed sheets and on Castiel’s skin. And Dean could’ve been pissed about that, but instead he washed the sheets out and helped Castiel clean off the blood. And then Castiel spread his wings. Or at least he tried. It felt like his wings were going to snap. And they were going to.

  The final stage is a feather falling off, one by one, painful. Like they are being ripped off.

  “Dean!” Castiel ran to Dean, crying. “Cas? What is it?” Dean held his friend’s arms. “M-My wings!” Dean was confused. Can angels lose their wings? “Ok. Ok, come on.” Dean helped a crying Castiel to his bedroom where they sat all night as Castiel cried in pain, clutching Dean’s shirt. Dean cooed him and pet his hair, hugging him tightly. “It’s okay. I’m right here, Cas.” And then Dean could see it. The piles of dark gray feather behind Castiel. And he cried, too. “It’s alright. Let it go, Cas.” Dean reached for a feather and he held it in his fingers, petting the small memento. Castiel looked down. And then he looked behind himself to see the small pile. And he cried harder as he picked a few of them up.

  “WHY?!” he screamed at the ceiling, knowing God was there to listen. Dean looked up at his friend and wrapped his arms around him again. Castiel hugged back, feeling naked.

  And that is how Castiel lost his wings.

  Dean could see it. Sam couldn’t which was not understood, even to Cas, but Dean could see it. The bones. The reminder that Castiel no longer has wings. Castiel was lifeless. His eyes were always glossy and always red and the bags were just a reminder that he needs sleep, but argues with Dean telling him angels don’t sleep. But he’s not even sure he’s an angel anymore.

 

  “Cas.” Dean entered his bedroom to see Cas sitting on the bed, staring at the pile of feathers that he refused to clean up. He ignored Dean. “Cas, I think it’s time-” Cas snapped his head up at Dean. “My grace is drained, Dean.” He said, a tear running down his face. “I’m a skeleton.” Dean sighed and went over to Castiel. He sat next to him and held his face in his hands. “Everything’s gonna be okay,” he reassured. Castiel shook his head. “Castiel.” Dean scolded. “Yes?” And Dean couldn’t think of anything else. No other alternative was in his head but to kiss Castiel. And that’s exactly what he did. He cradled Cas’s face and kissed him. Just a closed mouth kiss to the lips that lasted for ten seconds but felt like forever.

  Dean pulled away first to see Castiel’s eyes bright blue. But his expression never changed. “Cas, say something, please.” Castiel’s mouth was open but he didn’t say anything. And just as Dean was about to leave he spoke, “I would fly away from the awkwardness, but I have no wings.” Dean laughed. He didn’t know if he was supposed to, but he did because Castiel was so goddamn adorable when he was awkward and flying away in this situation was something he would do. But then Cas laughed, too. He laughed until his stomach hurt and he thought,  _ Everything’s gonna be okay. _

+++

  They finally cleaned Castiel’s feathers. He blessed every one of them and packed them in a box. That afternoon, the three went to a nearby river. “Cas?” Castiel stepped up to the plate, took the box from Dean and took one more peek at his feathers. Then he placed the box into the gentle waters and watched it swim away. Sam left the two alone together and Dean shifted closer to Cas, who was yet to cry. “You're still my angel, Cas.” Dean whispered taking his hand in his own. Cas let him and leaned his head on how Dean’s shoulder.

  “I don't feel like an angel, Dean.” Dean looked behind Cas ands saw the skinny, crippled skeleton of his wings. And Dean has nothing to say. He only kissed Castiel’s cheek and then his lips. A sweet, loving, open mouthed kissed. Castiel felt nothing.

  Sam left to find Charlie and discuss the Stynes and where they are because the last time he talked to her she had a lead on them. So Dean and Cas were left alone for the day. They were laying together on his bed, their eyes closed but not sleeping. And Dean so desperately wanted to say something but he didn't know what. But then Castiel did the honors. “Dean?”

  “Yeah, Cas?”

  “What now?” Dean paused then turned his head toward the angel. “How do you mean?” Castiel took a breath. “With us. With me. With life.” Dean looked back at the ceiling and took Castiel’s hand in his and laced their fingers together. “I don’t know, Cas. But I’m right here. I’m right here all the way.” Cas smiled, his wings tucked away neatly. After a few moments of silence, Dean spoke up, “Cas?” “Yes, Dean?” “Can we stay like this forever.” Cas frowned. “Forever is an awful long time.” Dean sighed. “Yeah, I know.

+++

 They lay together naked. But not sexually. Cas was on his back and Dean was on his stomach, his left arm draped over Castiel’s waist. They had showered ten minutes prior to their laying. Cas was dragging his fingers around Dean’s back and singing quietly in Enochian. “I love you, Cas.” “I love you, too, Dean.” Dean kissed Cas’s side and smiled. “You’re my grace, Dean.” Dean grinned. That night, they fell asleep like that. This isn't your average everyday fairy tale. It's bloody and painful and sad but some parts are happy. Like this part. This moment right here. And that is why Dean fell asleep with a grin on his face.


End file.
